Category Archives: Personal

I Am About To Rant. You Have Been Warned.

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So I posted links to this Free Range Kids Blog Post about a 9 year left in a car to wait for mom and dad with her 6 year old sleeping sibling. Someone walking by called the police and CPS and Dad got arrested for child neglect.

I posted this in several places, deliberately.  The question I asked? Not, is it okay to leave a 9 year old and a 6 year old alone in a car in a busy car park.  Because the answer to that question is that it depends on the 9 and 6 year old.  No, I asked should it be a police matter if parents believe their 9 year old is able to watch their 6 year old sleeping sibling in a car.

Have now been told, over and over, that I am crazy to think that any 9 year old is mature enough to watch their sleeping sibling.  That I could not possibly know what a 9 year old is like, since Adam is only 11.5 weeks.  Oh and that for sure the dad should have been arrested for neglect.

Excuse me?

So what these people are telling me is that I am not allowed to make decisions based on my knowledge of my own child?  Obviously I do not yet know what Adam will be like as a 9 year old.  This does not mean that I do not think about the future and how I would react depending on how he is at that age.  This does not mean that I do not already know that I (and his father, obviously) plan to raise him as ‘free range’ as possible, depending on how he is and the situation.

But, apparently, there are people in the world who will assume he is abandoned, neglected, what have you because they see him in a situation that they think is dangerous. Without making sure it actually is.

And the scenarios they’ve come up with as to why its dangerous?  Well, at least it wasn’t kidnapping fears.  It was, the 9 year old might get bored and play with the car controls.  Or the 6 year old might wake up and ignore what the 9 year old says.

Gee, I don’t know.  I think if I thought my 9 year old was capable of staying in the car with the 6 year old, I would be pretty sure that the 9 year old wouldn’t play with the car controls and I would be pretty damn sure that the 6 year old would listen to the 9 year old.

I was also told that that was ridiculous.  That no 6 year old would ever listen to a 9 year old.

My mind boggles.

I don’t care how you raise your kids.  Get off my back about how I raise mine.

BTW, these are the same people who are amazed when they read stories about university students who can’t interact with professors without parental intervention.  And recent graduates whose parents call to check up on job interviews.

I guess they don’t realize that this is exactly the kind of kid they just might be raising.

Yesterday The Best Thing Ever Happened.

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Adam gave his first full on belly laugh.  I was laughing at him because he paused in his feeding to let out a huge fart and my laughing led to him laughing.

It was one of those ‘damn, why isn’t the video camera aimed at him 24/7’ moments.  And it was the most joyous sound I have ever heard.

My good, big son.  The smiley laughing boy.

So, I Once Swore I Wouldn’t Use

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Facebook or MySpace or any other social networking site because they were stupid.

I was wrong.

Sure, people can take them much too seriously.  Just like message boards.

But what I am finding really really neat is the way my friends are interconnecting just because they all know me.

Example:

My status said: How does a 2 month old get dirt under his fingernails? Has he been gardening when I’m not looking?

I received two responses.  My friend Margo said if he was gardening send him her way to help her.  Then my friend Teresa said and after he’s done at Margo’s send him to me.

Margo and Teresa have never met.  Will never meeting.  Are in no way connected except that they both know me.  Margo lives in the UK.  Teresa in the US.  I know Margo through one message board, Teresa through another.

There have been other, more involved conversations amongst people on my friends list in response to my status updates.  I find it fascinating.

People also ask me if all 114 people listed as my friends are actually people I know.  Most of them are.  Recently I have added people I don’t really know because I play a few Facebook games where you get further in the game the more people you friend who also play the game.  So I have responded to some requests on some message boards to be friended for that purpose. The games are Farm Town and Farmville if anyone wants to neighbour me!!

But that’s about 10 people out of 114.  Have I met them all in real life? Nope.  But they are really my friends.  People I speak to daily via various venues.  Or they are my family!  Ya know, people I’m related to via blood or marriage!

And through them I speak to people I would never have had met.  And they do the same through me.

It ain’t called the World Wide Web for nothing…

Letter to My Son – Adam – 2 Months Old

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Dear Adam

Today you are 2 months old.  Would you believe not one trip the hospital for anything other than a check up for the whole month?

Of course, this doesn’t mean you haven’t been hurt.  Daddy was clipping your fingernails and missed and cut a big chunk out of one of your fingers.  That’s the hardest you’ve cried.  And the blood!  And the Daddy guilt.  Which I told him to stop, as its nothing compared to Mummy dropping you on your head!

You were at the hospital for your after head dropping check up and it turns out that you did crack a rib as well.  Nothing they can do except let it heal, especially since it is obviously not hurting you.  You do still have a big lump on your side and the Doctor said that was why.  You have been discharged though!  So no more hospitals for you, please, my son. Just your regular baby clinic visits and jabs!

We’ve also had some bad days of crankiness and not sleeping.  Mummy thinks its a bit of colic.  Or maybe just being 2 months old.  She tells herself, and you and Daddy, this too will pass.  Some day you’ll be 18 and we’ll be fretting about something else.  Like you wanting to take a year to travel the world with your unsuitable girlfriend. 🙂

You’ve started to smile at Mummy and Daddy.  Its the best thing in the whole world.  Along with your babbling to yourself as you sit in your chair.  Or maybe you’re babbling to your animals that hang on it?

SDC10381

Things we’ve learned about you this month: –

  • If you are totally hysterical, but won’t take a bottle or a dummy or even a hug, putting you under your mobile in your cot is instant calm.  Winnie the Pooh for the win!
  • If you are obviously sleepy but just won’t settle, a good swaddle in  your blue blanket and a few minutes cuddle (usually) knocks you out for at least a little while!

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  • You are beginning to be able to sooth yourself back to sleep, so long as you aren’t hungry or dirty.
  • You make a sound that sounds like a giggle.  But might not be.

At your last weigh in your were 12lbs and 22inches.  My great big boy!

Keep growing!

Love

Mummy

I Never Write About Celebrities On Here

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There are plenty of blogs who do that.

And I never grieve when a celebrity dies.  I didn’t know them, why grieve?  I feel bad for their families, but you will never find me crying over a celebrity death.

But John Hughes’ death I am grieving over.

Not just because it means part of my teenagehood just died.  Not really.  But because of what that part of my teenagehood meant to me.

I was, to put it midly, a disturbed teenager.  Angry, anxious, obnoxious.  Rude, sarcastic.  Mean.  Horrible to my parents, my siblings.  To everyone.

But sit down and watch a John Hughes flick? And it all went away.  In his movies the geek was cool.  The not so popular girl got the big footballer player as her boyfriend.  The cool car was available for driving.  Pure 100% escapism for all of us angsty teenagers.

There is a reason the Brat Pack did so well.  And, in some cases, are still doing so well.  They spoke to us.  Through John Hughes’ words and direction they were us.  Doing what we did. Or wished we could do.

Go to YouTube and you’ll see what I mean.  Since his death was annouced there have been 100s of tribute videos posted.  With snippets of his movies. With stills.  With the music. He touched a generation.

My generation.

RIP Mr John Hughes.  Your legacy will live forever.

Excuse me now.  I have to go put every movie he ever made on my LoveFilm list now.

Baby Brain, I Think Its Catching…

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So, every Monday night Simon and I have groceries delivered for the week.  This means that on Sunday we figure out what we want to eat Tuesday through Friday and order ingredients accordingly.

This morning I began pulling the items out to make tonight’s Chicken Cacciatore, so I could prep veggies while Adam was being happy in his bouncy seat.  Then I would just have to bung them and some chicken into the slow cooker at lunch time and 6 hours later, dinner would be on the table.

So I am rummaging through my veg drawer and I realize Tesco had sent me 4 onions.  ‘Why four onions?’ I said out loud.

Simon said ‘What are we having this week?’

‘Chicken Cacciatore, Chicken Casserole, Goulash, Veggie Lasagne and…wait, what’s the fourth thing?’ I replied.  ‘Chicken Cacciatore, Chicken Casserole, Goulash, Veggie Lasagne and…’ I repeated.

‘Check the ingredients we have.’ Simon suggested, ‘and that will tell you the fourth thing.’

Can you see what we both did there?  Both of us?

That’s right, for the non-baby brained out there…I was naming four things. And Simon was agreeing right along with me that I was missing one.

Once it occurred to me, just a few minutes later, how stupid we were, I then still couldn’t figure out why I had four onions.

It just occurred to me 10 minutes ago.  Because all four things have an onion in them.

Simon says his excuse was that he was on night duty last night and what was mine?

Baby Brain.

And I think its catching…

Yesterday’s Story Actually Had Two Morals

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One is the already listed: take a shower when the opportunity arises.

The other is to always, always, have the diaper bag packed and ready to go!  And I always do.

Yesterday was a pretty good day.  I got my hair cut and coloured.  Simon, Adam and I did some shopping.  I had a nice nap in the afternoon.

Today? Not such a good day.

Started with a Night from Hell (TM).  Adam went down about 2230.  And woke up at 0030.  And up again at 0230.  At 0500. At 0700.  At that point I woke Simon up and handed him over and headed back to bed.

Then the rest of today he just would.not.sleep.  Not for more than 20 minutes at a time, at least.  Not in his pram when Simon took him out to the shops so I could have a break and soak in the tub.  Not in my arms while swaddled in his favourite blanket (can an almost 8 week old baby have  favourite blanket? Not sure, but the one Grandma and Pops with the Pool sent is definitely the best for swaddling).  Not even in the Bjorn which got him to sleep for about 3.5 hours on Thursday during our Great Adventure.  He finally fell asleep about an hour ago at 2030.  And I hear sounds of stirring.  Which could be good, as my dream night goes like this, starting at about 2200: –

Nappy Change

Into Grobag/PJs

Bottle

Sound asleep for 5+ hours.

Hey, a Mummy can dream. 🙂