I don’t talk about my dad much here or anywhere else online. We have a bit of a complicated relationship.
I last saw him just over a year ago when I flew to Ohio to visit. I went for two reasons:
He was diagnosed with dementia and he was turning 80.
It was a good, if short, visit. It was just me as it was in September and Simon and Adam both had school.
So I’ve been watching him forget things via Skype.
Things like how a computer works (he taught me about computers), what a DVD is, and people. Not his immediate family, but my extended family, who used to be his family.
And it’s not that he forgets for a minute. It’s like he never knew it at all.
And now he’s fallen in his garage and broken an arm and a hip. My step mom called 911 and got him to the hospital.
And yesterday he had three pins put in the hip. The surgery went really well.
And his three grown children, me, my sister (who lives near them in Ohio) and my brother suddenly realised we all had iPhones and could talk for free on iMessenger!
So my sister has been sending updates. And my brother and I have been sending love and verbal support.
Because the three of us haven’t been close, physically or emotionally, for years.
But we are all losing our dad.
One memory at a time…