Let me preface this post with the note that I do not cut myself. I do not self harm that way.
So how do I do it? By picking my pimples. Yes, that is considered self harm behavior.
My face is very discoloured under my chin from picking at the pimples there. I am trying to break myself of the habit, but I think it does two things for me. It gives me ‘worry spots’ and, in some odd way, it sooths me.
I don’t just pick my face. I pick anything on my body that’s pickable. I had a very odd cut on my upper right arm that I picked the scab on. I pick in grown hairs on my knees. Anything I can get my fingernails into, I pick.
Its gross. I know its gross. And I try very hard to not do it in public. Or even in front of my husband. But I also don’t always realize I’m doing it.
I am not sure I will ever be able to stop completely. Even when I am at my most stable, I do it. Some people rock in place to sooth. I pick.