Category Archives: Thoughts

Counting My Blessings – Blog Hop

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So I am joining in with Salt and Carmel‘s Blog Hop this week and counting my blessings.
They include:

  • A fantastic husband
  • A fantastic son who, while has constant colds and such, is relatively healthy
  • A career I love
  • A warm place to live
  • Enough food to eat
  • Great friends, near and far
  • A loving family
  • And, most of all, recently some fantastically pain free and productive days

I wish, very badly, that this was just another Blog Hop that I thought would be fun and/or inspiring. But it’s so much more than that.

Because this Blog Hop was started off because of this:

Source: http://saltandcaramel.com

This picture was drawn by Aillidh. She is 8 years old and has Acute Myeloid Leukaemia. She’s just started her third round of chemo and is desperately praying for a bone marrow donor. She is the daughter of a fellow Mumsnetter, which is how I, and many others, heard of her. She also has Facebook Page asking for help and encouraging people to register for or donate to the Bone Marrow Register.

That picture inspired this post at Salt and Carmel, the Twitter Tag #makemebetter, and this Blog Hop.

Everyone has problems and no ones problems are better or worse than anyone else’s.

But Aillidh needs a donor. So I am counting my blessings and helping to spread the word.

If you are eligible, please consider signing up to donate. Since Aillidh is of mixed race, finding a donor for her is harder, and actually most likely to come from the US as she is of white Scottish and meztizo – the mix of European and indigenous N. American peoples (Native American/Indian) descent.

In the UK you can contact the Anthony Nolan Trust.

In the US there is the Be The Match Donor Register website.

If like me, due to poor health and/or age you can do neither, please spread the word. ‘Like’ Aillidh’s Facebook page. Tweet using the #makemebetter tag. Pray.

It’s not just for Aillidh. But for all the ill children and adults who are looking for a miracle.

Let’s spread the word and use the power we have to help all of them live long and healthy lives.

The Fine Line

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Anyone who knows me knows I think privacy is rapidly dying. Between everyone posting everything to Facebook and Twitter every minute and the fact that nothing is ever really gone from the ‘net, I think anonymity is already dead and total lack of privacy isn’t far behind.

This is why I never put things on the ‘net that I wouldn’t say out loud to people who I barely know. You may think I lay myself bare on here, but I don’t. You may know my real name, the name of my son and my husband and even the city we live in. But you don’t really know me unless you are one of my very closest friends, and those are few and far between. There are lots and lots of things I never blog, Tweet or status about.

This was brought to glaring attention this week when a very well known blogger, who I won’t name here as I am not trying to advertise their blog or their problems, admitted on their blog that their partner had moved out. That their marriage was in trouble.

And I found myself unsurprised. Because their relationship, while I am sure not recorded second by second, was very open on the blog. Their fights. Their issues. Their triumphs and their pains. And yet, they looked to be the perfect couple. Too perfect and I felt there were cracks. Because too much of their relationship was happening on stage.

I rarely talk about my marriage on here. Oh I talk about Simon, sure. But not about our relationship. Not really. Because it’s no one’s business but ours. And our close friends. It certainly isn’t the business of the random people who read this blog.

And that’s the way things will remain. If you don’t want the world to know your business, don’t talk about your business. If you don’t want people to figure out who you are, don’t post on the internet. Ever.

Because nothing is ever gone from the ‘net. And once it’s out there? It’s out there.

I will tell you, however, that Simon and I have strong, stable and loving marriage. Divorce is not an issue. Murder, on the other hand…

Why I Really Hate Taveling by Air

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I am resigned to the pointless and ineffective security measures (really, the liquid thing is just stupid and it’s time to end it). I don’t mind the full body scan (had it for the first time at Manchester). I don’t even mind the over the top charges for things like seat selection and checking baggage. I just don’t check bags and take a random seat.

What I do mind are the things that make no real sense.

Example: On my trip home from Manchester I was on one of those smaller planes with the actual propellers. Not a puddle jumper; about one step up. I was sitting in the front row on what is the exit, so the flight attendant came over to ask me if I was okay with that (yes) and gave me a 2 second demo of how to open the door (cuz I’d really remember that if we were crashing or had crashed). Then she said to me:

“You need to either put your jumper on or put it in the overhead. I can’t have anything free in the cabin at take off.’ I raised an eyebrow at that, but put it on.

Why the raised eyebrow? Because the man across from me, also at the bulkhead, had a magazine open on his lap. He didn’t have to stow it for take off. Is a jumper more danger than a magazine?

And because the flight attendant then sat down and opened her little notebook of flight paperwork and filled it out during take off. So my jumper is a risk, but her hard backed notebook and pen aren’t?

It’s the total lack of logic, really, that makes me go O_o.

But I showed her. What she didn’t know was that my bottle of water was behind my back, hidden from her view, as I slouched in my seat.

Just a tiny bit of rebellion, but it felt good!

Why HP Sucks

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Because in order to set up a wireless printer you need a USB cable. HUH?

I actually found an old forum with instructions on how to do it without one but anyone who is not even just a little bit technically minded would have no clue.

So our printer is set up. Wirelessly.

Which you should be able to do with ease. Since it’s, ya know, a wireless printer.

But it took some tech know how and a lot of searching and help from a wonderful person on MN, @boborama, who found how to get a network configuration page out of the printer (Hold down the scan button for 4 seconds. Yes. Of course. First thing I would have thought of. O_o).

And now we can print.

But still.

HP sucks.

Nobody Gets My Humour

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for the second time in just about a month someone has taken something I have said as a joke as serious. Both times the person became angry with me. One of them happened face to face and I apologized right away and we worked it out. The other one was through email and the apology I sent has not been acknowledged so I have no idea what’s happening with that.

The thing is, I know I can have an odd sense of humour and I am very careful to not crack wise with people who don’t know me. Not until we’ve had a few interactions and I know they get it when I am joking.

Which is what makes both of these instances odd. Because these are both people I have made the same sort of jokes with previously and they have joked right back. Until these two times.

One of the people I have worked with for, literally, years. The other one just a few months, but we have certainly joked around together.

So I just don’t get it. Did I hit too close to home both times? Get them both on bad days?

Or maybe it’s just time for me to find that deserted island and take only people I actually can stand to be around for more than a few hours with me. The island would have a population of about 10.

Sounds perfect.

Dear Google: Stop.

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So the other day Google changed the look of their Reader. It is now stark white and gives me a headache to look at. No exaggeration. So I have stopped using it and moved over to Netvibes instead, on the recommendation of a friend.

This is after they changed the way their chat works so that if you have GMail for Domains, which I do, it no longer let’s you interface with AIM. I speak to my mom and my sister via AIM. So now I have to be logged into an additional programme in order to speak to either of them.

You are suppose to be able to be logged into multiple GMail accounts, for domains or not, in one browser. Except it assumes that if you log out of a user name in one programme, i.e. the aforementioned Reader, you want to log out in all the others. So I am constantly logging back into YouTube and my Designed To A Tee calendar. YouTube is through Simon’s account since he was not stuck in the hospital for 5 days after having a child that people wanted videos of. And our family Calendar is on DTAT, so I use it quite a lot. It all worked fine for about a week. And then they launched Google+ which I can’t use thanks to the previously mentioned use of Google for Domains.

So, Google. Stop. You aren’t making things better with these changes. You are making them worse. Stick to what you do well, which is search engines.

Thanks.

Why I Like Not Having a Car

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As I was walking home from taking Adam to nursery this morning it occurred to me how much I like not having a car. How much I would miss if I was zipping down the road instead of walking.

For example, if I had been driving, I wouldn’t have been able to spend a part of walk watching, fascinated, as a pair of men changed the billboard on the corner near my house. It’s one of those billboards that flips between adverts and I watched as they worked from opposite ends, obviously from numbered strips, inserting the boards in. They weren’t going in order so I have no idea what the advert was, but it was very cool to watch them work.

Also, if I had been driving, I would never have noticed that they were painting the fence around the Ormeau Bath Gallery. It’s a nice fence, with gold finials. Now the rails are red, instead of black. I would bet not one of the people in the cars going by noticed that they were changing the colour of the fence.

If I were a driver I never would have noticed that the Worst Burger King in the World (TM) was becoming some other restaurant. Finally. It’s been closed for around 4 years. But now there are workmen going in and out and something is happening. There was a sign saying what it was but it’s gone now. Probably lost their funding like so many others these days.

So I like not having a car. As I can see what’s going on in my neighbourhood. Soon to not be my neighbourhood!

M-Day minus 9…

 

Bucket List

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So there’s a meme, started by @Ellen27, about bucket lists. She was inspired by the film of the same name which starred Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman. A bucket list is a list of things you want to do before you kick the bucket.

So I’ve been thinking about what to put on my bucket list. And I can’t think of a single thing.

Sure, there are things I want; more money, more time, more clients. But nothing that I feel I have to or need to do before I die.

Sure there are places I want to visit; Paris springs to mind. But, again, not something I feel I absolutely need to do before I die.

I’ve seen lists of things like ‘be a kinder person every day’ and ‘spend more time with my family’. That’s not what I call a ‘do it before you die’ thing.

So I guess it means I’m content. I have the big things I want: a husband I love, a son who is becoming more wonderful every day, I am my own boss. My health could be better but there isn’t much I can do about that.

So I guess my Bucket List is to just…live.

And I’m okay with that.

Must Be Tuesday or A Day In The Life

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Recently Dooce has been doing a series about what her days are like. I’m finding it very interesting and thought I’d do the same.

Of course, I am not Dooce. I only have one child, I don’t have a PA and I don’t run a multi-million dollar media empire. But, still. It might be a worthwhile read.

Let’s take a Tuesday, since not every of the week is the same around here, but most Tuesdays are fairly standard.

Simon gets up with Adam somewhere between 6 and 7. This means Adam cries. He loves his daddy, but, for some reason, not first thing in the morning. We tell Adam to deal with it, Mummy’s having a lie in.

I get up between 715 and 730 and put my coffee on. Simon only drinks instant (bleech) so I have to make it myself. I also make toast with peanut butter and juice, take my blood sugar and pop 6 pills; 3 paracetamol, 1 xanax and 2 metphormin.

I then share my breakfast with Adam, who may or may not have had something to eat before I get up but certainly has had some milk. Simon is in the shower at this point.

I then spend 5 minutes chasing Adam around trying to wipe peanut butter off his hands and face. Sometimes I am even successful.

After that, I make Simon’s lunch. Yes. I make my husband lunch nearly every day. Why? Well, it saves us gobs of money, for one thing. But the real reason is because that used to be my only bit of ‘me’ time in the morning.  Back before Adam was mobile and had his own ideas (oh those halcyon days!) Simon would come get him from me and play with him while he got dressed. Then I could actually drink my coffee, make Simon’s lunch and usually have at least 5 minutes to relax before I had a baby to take care of all day by myself. Now Adam runs around the flat, nearly spilling my coffee, trying to steal his dad’s lunch bag and generally being 2. Sometimes Simon convinces him to come play in the bedroom. But not often.

Then we say bye bye to Daddy and I sit and try to finish my coffee.

Tuesday is grocery day so after that I write my list, after conferring with Simon the night before about what to have for dinner during the week. Adam will be conferred with as well. Some day.

It’s around 9 at this point and Adam is running around insanely so I go jump into the shower so we can get out the door.

These days Adam decides how he’s getting to city centre. If he wants to walk, he walks, so long as he holds hands with no fuss at street crossings. If he wants to ride, he rides and I make sure we do somewhere he can run around. Today that was Corn Market and Victoria Square.

Then we do our errands. And Adam gets back into his pram at some point and falls asleep. Usually after or during Tesco.

Then we are home. Adam keeps sleeping for at least 2 hours when he falls asleep like that (whoot!) so I have some lunch myself, do some housework and/or lie around being lazy, depending on what’s going on.

Adam wakes up around 2 and I give him lunch.

Then we play all afternoon. Colouring, puzzles, his barn, whatever he feels like. This can also include sofa snuggles and CBeeBies. I really just take his lead.

Simon gets home from work any time between 4 and 6, depending on his lecture schedule. Then we have dinner. Then Adam has a bath and goes to bed.

And then I veg and then I go to bed.

And so endeth Tuesday.

 

10 Years Ago Today

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My grandmother died.

This means I was home from work 10 years ago tomorrow when the Twin Towers came down. I had taken the day off to reflect and to see if I wanted to fly to Boston for her funereal.

Instead I sat, on the phone to my sister in law, who lived down the Bay from me, watching it unfold. I didn’t usually have the TV on in the mornings (The first plane hit 546 California time, yes I was already up. I’ve always been an early riser) but turned it on after the radio informed that a plane had hit the first tower. I distinctly remember thinking ‘stupid pilot!’ not realizing, as no one did at that point, that it was deliberate.

I rang into work, even though they already knew I wouldn’t be in, at some point that day to see if they were evacuating, since I worked in down town Oakland, maybe not a prime target, but one easily hit if someone misjudged the more likely Central Business District of San Francisco, just across The Bay. He said no one had decided anything yet. I knew at that point I wasn’t going to make it to Boston.

I remember the calls across the internet as my international group of friends begged for news from our friends in New York and, once the Pentagon was hit, Washington D.C.

I remember the worry of my sister in law as my brother was in Boston on business. He would be stuck there for a week until airline travel resumed. He was one of the few grandkids who did make it to my grandma’s funereal who usually lived longer than driving distance. Even my mother didn’t make it, and it was her mother.

I don’t dwell on what happened on a regular basis. I think about it on the anniversary, as do most people. How can you not with it all over the media every year? I know people who lost people. My own mother worked in the Towers 10 years or so earlier.

My heart goes out to all who lost people that day.

That day that changed America forever.