that I tend to post in this blog very early in morning. Or maybe not because I don’t think I have a time stamp on here!
Anyway, I do. Right now it is 0504. Yes, 5am. I’ve actually been up since 0430.
I have insomnia. I don’t actually have to be up for work until 0700, but here I am, 0500, up and posting.
Except for being tired all the time, I don’t actually mind being up this early. Its quiet, I get to use the computer without my husband asking me when I’ll be done and I do actually like having the extra time to myself in the morning. Of course I prefer waking up this early on the weekend, when I can get a nap in the afternoon, but I don’t really mind it during the week.
The reason I have insomnia, I think, is my aforementioned Anxiety Disorder. Not because I am particularly anxious at the moment, I’m not anxious at all, actually, but because my brain chemistry is off. I fall asleep fine, sometimes as early as 2130 (that’s 9:30pm to those of you who don’t do well with a 24 hour clock), but I don’t stay asleep. If I sleep until 0530, I consider that a good sleep.
People ask me why I don’t just go to bed later. Well, I don’t really see the point. Even if I went to bed at 2200 or even 2300 I would still be up about 7 hours later. It would just be later in the morning!
I have been trying to convince myself to join the gym across the street from our flat so I could go when they open at 0600 and use my time wisely, but I just can’t seem to motivate myself to do that. I really do enjoy sitting here, catching up on writing my blog, reading other people’s blogs (see my blogroll for the blogs I follow religiously) and sometimes writing fan fiction (and I really want to know why the word blog isn’t in Firefox’s spellchecker, here in the 21st C).
So I will continue to get up at 0500, or 0530, or sometimes even 0400. And some part of me will continue to enjoy it.